Milking the Music

Milking the Music

by, Diana B. Thompson

CinderSilly has to milk the cows.  Cows are big, and this is a very big chore! She is intimidated by the task and struggles with her frustration.  Finally, she makes up a song to sing.  The cows had never heard singing. They become quiet and still.  Suddenly the milk pours out faster and faster.  She fills 10 pails of milk, more refreshing and delicious than ever.

After a CinderSilly reading, a woman asked, “you have milked cows, haven’t you?” This woman had been raised on a farm, and she shared a story of her own childhood chores.  When it was her turn to milk the cows, she would blast her favorite pop station and the milk dried up.  When classical or jazz was played, the milk was plentiful.  Turns out that cows have an inbred musical appreciation.  No, I have never milked a cow.  But, I know that music soothes the savage beast - be they cows or the untamed feelings within.

Teach Compassion or Risk Losing Our Humanity

Teach Compassion or Risk Losing Our Humanity

By Diana B. Thompson, and Betty Brittain, PhD

Following the Steubenville verdict, the victim’s mother said, "Human compassion is not taught by a teacher, a coach or a parent. It is a God-given gift instilled in all of us."  

 

We are each born with a capacity for empathy, kindness and caring.  Watch any group of three-year-olds, and you will see compassion is a skill that needs cultivating.  Left un-nurtured, compassion gets bullied off the playground.

Whose job is it to teach compassion? Schools are geared towards academics. Teachers are inundated with the demands of standardized testing, safety, and security.  Time for character development is limited.  Sports are designed for competition. Coaches are prized more for winning than guiding.  Celebrities and athlete role models often convey a "break the rules" attitude.  Religion is taking a smaller role in positively influencing behavior.

 

Perhaps compassion is reinforced at home. According to the Kaiser Foundation, the average child age 8-18 spends 4.5 hours watching TV each day. The media might reflect a few touching moments, but character development through TV is limited at best. Let’s face it, Mister Rogers has been replaced by Sponge Bob.

Young people learn from experience and interaction with others. In a restaurant recently, I sat between two families.  On one side, the adults engaged in conversation while the four-year-old watched cartoons on an iPad. A 6-year-old played games on a phone and never spoke. On the other side, sat a mother and her 9-year-old son.  Mom was engaged with her iPad, while the boy spent dinner texting.  They interacted only a few short minutes during the entire meal. Engaging in television and social media is an isolating experience. Given life’s demands and distractions, it’s easy to lose track of our children.

Steubenville is a wake up call for everyone.  This is an important time to re-engage the young people in our lives to ensure they are developing a caring capacity.  If you are a coach, parent, aunt, uncle, teacher, neighbor or friend, get involved.  Ask, "if you saw someone abused, what would your role be?". Visit social media conversations. See what they are saying.  Share stories of empathy and generosity. Celebrate them.  Teaching comes through example.  Be a kind and caring role model.

Teaching human compassion might be the missing link to prevent another Steubenville. We cannot leave this lesson to chance. It’s time to teach compassion or risk losing our humanity.

Dramatic Adventures produces materials to teach social, emotional and problem solving skills. Find us at www.dramaticadventures.com.

The Feelings in the Fairytale

The Feelings in the Fairytale

by, Diana B. Thompson

CinderSilly powerfully getting herself to the ball on a pedi-pumpkin

CinderSilly is from a series of interactive performance programs called Fairytales and Feelings by Dramatic Adventures, Inc. The classes were designed to help students recognize, identify and manage every day emotions. CinderSilly illustrations were carefully designed to reflect the complex range of emotions for each character.  Models were carefully posed to convey body language and subtle facial expressions.  With each challenge, CinderSilly works through her emotions to overcome the difficulty at hand.  When reading the book with children, it is a wonderful opportunity to explore feelings in the book and in life.  Ask your child, “have you ever felt that way?”  Use the CinderSilly fairytale to open the world of Feelings and increase the power of EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE!

Illustrations by Jill Haller and Thom Buchanan

Glass Slippers Can Be Broken

Glass Slippers Can Be Broken

by, Diana B. Thompson

Who came up with the idea of glass slippers any way? They would be horribly uncomfortable, and unless it is made of plexi-glass, it would break!!! But wait, they didn’t have plexi-glass when Cinderella was written.  So now she is light as a feather?  She can wear delicate little glass shoes without breaking them? Come on!

Any self-respecting Cinderella would take one look at those ridiculous shoes and say, “no way!” Well, that’s just what CinderSilly does.  Not only does she refuse the high fashion of glass slippers, but she weaves ribbons through her own favorite shoes.  These dancing shoes can’t be broken, and neither can a girl who is true to herself. When you think for yourself, you make choices that are right for you. And sometimes, that means saying NO to fashion accessories that can cut you to the bone.



Photo Credit:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/stsurla/4602641398/

The Victim Trap

The Victim Trap

by, Diana B. Thompson

A Strong Princess Who Can Hold the Moon and the Earth

Little girls love princess pretend.  In most princess stories, the lead is a victim of her circumstance.  She is helpless until someone saves her.  That saving is fantastically dramatic and romantic.  Her beauty and worthy kindness are rewarded. 

Whether we realize it or not, this glorifies the role of victim.  A child could easily see an advantage to accepting this debilitating role.  It can provide the comfort of sympathy and encourage others to solve the problem.  You don’t have to be in a fairytale to play the victim.  A victim is an easy target on the playground, in the workplace and in a relationship.

Instead of finding her power through pushing through hardship, a child could imagine there is a power in weakness.  I believe this is potentially the most damaging influence of many princess stories.  You will recognize this in a child who is always looking to others to solve problems, to correct little injuries, We must help re-define the role of "Princess" as a girl who is independent, and self assured; a girl who is creative and strong.  CinderSilly.

Find out more at www.cindersilly.com

Original Art By:
Sydney Rachel Rutledge, age 6
Oil Pastel on Fine Tooth Sketch Paper

The Prince Pitfall

The Prince Pitfall

by, Diana B. Thompson

I was attending a book event, and the tall 30-something man stopped at my table. Alone.  He just stood there, as if waiting for something.

“This is the most important Cinderella story you will find.” I told him. “CinderSilly doesn’t need magic or marriage to solve her problems.”

The man suddenly became very animated, as if he’d been waiting for his cue.

“Do you know how hard it is to be the prince in shining armor?” he ranted. “I can’t sweep a girl off her feet.  I have a bad back.”

“I wrote this book for you,” I laughed.

With all the talk about the Cinderella trap for girls, it’s easy to overlook the prince charming pitfall for boys. Girls who buy into the princess scenario, may have unrealistic expectations of their male counterparts.  Just like Cinderellas are expected to be beautiful and helpless, Prince Charmings are handsome, wealthy, and strong.

While testing CinderSilly, I had the chance to read it for a group of adult women.  A near riot occurred when I reached the story’s end.  There was no romantic dance, no warm embrace, no happily ever after in wedded bliss.  They were horrified.  “Just what kind of fairytale is this?” They asked.  I replied, “The kind where girls can be strong and resourceful.  And, where boys can just be friends.”

Where Do Dreams Come True?

Where do dreams come true? 

by, Diana B. Thompson

I recently had a chance to share the story of CinderSilly with a woman who grew up and traveled extensively outside the United States.  She told me, “the idea of dreams coming true is a uniquely American concept.” I imagined it was a Disney invention.

Of course we want our children (as well as ourselves) to have fantastic dreams and reach for glorious goals.  But, there is a delicate line to be drawn.  This concept could suggest that little or no effort is involved.  It could insinuate that ‘dreams coming true’ means every wish is granted.  A lottery is won. A child might imagine that all dreams should come true.  If they don’t, something is terribly wrong.  We don’t have to look far beyond Christmas morning to imagine such a scenario.

We would be better off to talk about specific dreams with our children in the form of very tangible goals and desires.  Instead of waiting for fate to fulfill our wants, what can we do to achieve them? Worthwhile dreams can always be saved for another day.  Life is a journey – of inventing dreams, then working towards them, and adapting if they don’t happen the way we imagine.


Photo credit: